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On the Leader Fluent Podcast, we’re in a series on my book, Insanely Practical Leadership: 12 No-Nonsense Keys to Master the Art of Leading Yourself and Others. The book addresses a host of insanely practical skills, and it provides you and your team with the tools to apply the insights to your life and leadership. The book is now available on Amazon, Kindle, and other retailers. On today’s episode, you’ll get a taste of my chapter on, “How to Communicate with Others.” Be sure to order Insanely Practical Leadership today, and check out the Masterclass as well as the bonus content that goes with the book HERE.

On January 28, 1986, just 73 second after lifting off from Cape Canaveral, the space shuttle Challenger exploded above the Atlantic Ocean. The 6-day mission abruptly ended, killing seven crew members—including Christa McAuliffe, a middle school teacher from New Hampshire. 

As a result of the disaster, President Ronald Reagan established a commission chaired by former Secretary of state William P. Rogers. What came to be known as the Rogers Commission Report identified the cause of the explosion: an O-ring seal had failed.

But it turns out, the failure was much deeper. In addition to an equipment failure, the report revealed organizational communication failures. In fact, the night before the launch, Bob Ebeling and four other engineers from Morton Thiokol raised concerns about the forecast temperatures and the impact they could have on the O-rings. 

Alarmed over the risk, they recommended the launch be grounded if the temperature fell below 53 degrees. But senior management overruled the recommendation. That night Bob Ebeling told his wife Darlene, “It’s going to blow up.” And the next day, it did.

In an interview 30 years later, Ebeling said, “I was one of the few that was really close to the situation. Had they listened to me and wait[ed] for a weather change, it might have been a completely different outcome.” The Rogers Commission Report stated that “failures in communication” and “selective listening” resulted in the decision to launch. As a result, seven innocent lives were lost. 

In most cases, poor communication isn’t a matter of life and death. And yet, it is. Why do I say that? Because in Proverbs 18:21, King Solomon said, “Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit—you choose.”

So, as a leader, how do you effectively communicate with others? I believe it requires six essential communication skills. 

1. Life-Giving Content

Proverbs 10:11 says, “The words of the godly are a life-giving fountain; the words of the wicked conceal violent intentions.” So, what does a life-giving fountain sound like? The substance of your words must pass three tests to be life-giving.

First, are your words truthful? Ephesians 4:15 says, “speak the truth in love.” Second, are your words wise? While truthful words are facts, wise words are discerning and full of perspective. King Solomon said, “Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing” (Proverbs 12:18). And third, are your words helpful? The apostle Paul said, “Say only what helps, each word a gift” (Ephesians 4:29, MSG). 

2. Clear Speech 

Mark Twain once said, “The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug.” If people can’t understand what you’re saying, then everything you say will undermine your credibility. That’s why clear speech is marked by three qualities: clarity, conciseness, and pace. 

First, clear speech is obviously clear. If it lacks clarity, it will create frustration and confusion for the people who hear you. Second clear speech is concise. When we ramble on and on about a topic, it becomes an emotional drain on our hearers. And finally, clear speech is spoken at the right pace. The average pace for a conversation is 150 words per minute. If your pace is too quick, people won’t follow what you have to say, and if it’s too slow, people will disengage. 

3. Positive Tone

As a leader, you can communicate in a positive tone or a negative tone, an open tone or a defensive tone, a hopeful tone or a depressive tone. But whatever tone you choose will set the overall temperature for your team.

King Solomon offered some good tone-setting wisdom in Proverbs 15:1 when he said, “A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.” So, whatever you do, be sure to choose a positive a tone.

4. Curious Questions 

Asking thoughtful questions invites others into the conversation. It helps you connect, invites feedback, and builds a bridge to active listening. And when you combine curiosity with your questions, you don’t just hear what others say, but you understand the heart behind the matter. Curiosity digs beneath the surface and helps you shift from being interesting to being interested.

5. Active Listening

Proverbs 18:2 says it like this: “Fools have no interest in understanding; they only want to air their own opinions.” Leading and listening are two different skills, but leading without listening will significantly handicap your leadership. So, if you want to avoid the path of the fool, practice active listening. Be interested without interrupting, and engage in the conversation with a listening posture.

In addition, to be an active listener, watch your body language, and pay attention to your eyes, facial expressions, and posture. Does your body language say, “I’m engaged” or “I’m bored”? Do you lean in with curiosity or are you distracted by what’s happening around you? 

6. Controlled Response

When our response is controlled, it’s a source of life. But when our response is uncontrolled, it unleashes devastation. That’s why it’s wise to heed the Apostle Paul’s instructions in Ephesians 4:2. He said, “Always be humble and gentle.”

Being a gentle leader might sound weak and wimpy, but the word “gentle” actually means power under control. A gentle response isn’t dependent on having power, but whether power has you. 

Each key plays an important role in communication, and each key helps you make healthy connections with others.

LEARN MORE ABOUT INSANELY PRACTICAL LEADERSHIP:

The teaching in this podcast series comes from my book, Insanely Practical Leadership: 12 No-Nonsense Keys to Master the Art of Leading Yourself and Others. Get your copy of the book, masterclass, and study guide to maximize your leadership and to invest in the growth of your team. You can learn more about Insanely Practical Leadership and the bonus content that goes with the book HERE. You can also order the book on Amazon, Kindle, and other retailers.

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