On March 18th, 2014, I republished an article on my blog titled, Being in the One-Third Who Finish Well. It’s an article based on research by Dr. J. Robert Clinton that asserts that only one-third of leaders finish well in their leadership journey. From his insights I shared several keys to help leaders finish well.

But here’s what’s ironic.

I updated this article over the 2013 Christmas break, and then selected March 18th as the actual date to republish it. Why is that ironic? Because that was the day I unexpectedly had open heart surgery. I certainly didn’t plan it that way, so imagine how my family and friends felt when an email hit their inbox about “finishing well” on the day that I was fighting for my life. To me that’s more than ironic…it’s downright freaky.

When I awoke from surgery and eventually realized what had happened, it gave me cause to pause and reflect. Am I on track to finish well? Am I doing the things that people who finish well do? If I had died, what would my legacy have been? These questions drove home an important truth:

You can’t decide when you finish, but you can determine how you finish. Legacy doesn’t happen in a day; legacy happens every day.

Your legacy doesn’t start when you take your last breath. It begins when you make your first choice. Your daily decisions are the runway of your legacy. Death is simply the stamp that delivers your legacy — for good or for bad — to future generations. And that highlights another truth:

If you want to leave a legacy worth remembering when you die, you have to write a legacy worth recording while you’re alive.

[bctt tweet=”To leave a legacy worth remembering, write a legacy worth recording while you’re alive”]

That raises a question.

How do unexpected disruptions shape your legacy? For some people, the unexpected casts a dark shadow over their legacy, especially when that shadow is shaped by sin. In those moments, “finishing well” may not even seem impossible. For others, a disruption becomes a catalyst that launches a new chapter in your legacy. But regardless of which side of the legacy coin you find yourself on, your response to the unexpected disruption is a legacy-defining moment. Remember this: People may not remember the size of the rocks that unexpectedly rained on your life, but they will remember how you responded to them. So ask yourself these questions:

• In one month, will I feel good about my response, or will I be reeling from the consequences of my response?
• In one year, will I be able to positively leverage my response as a teaching moment for others?
• In one lifetime, will I be remembered for choosing the right response?

So how do you choose the right response to unexpected disruptions so they can positively define your legacy? I believe that happens through what I like to call, “The Legacy Pyramid.” 

True legacy has three dimensions to it – character, contribution, and connection. And each of those three dimensions revolve around a central value for eternity.

1. Character: Who you are

The first dimension of legacy revolves around you as a person. Your character consists of integrity, spirituality, and pliability. It’s about how you live, who you follow, and your willingness to cooperate with God’s life-shaping process.

When the unexpected shows up, character is particularly important. People will remember you for your character because it provides stability to your legacy. Proverbs 20:7 says, “The godly walk with integrity; blessed are their children who follow them” (NLT).

2. Contribution: What you’ve done

The second dimension of legacy is the contribution you make to God’s Kingdom and society. Usually this contribution occurs through three resources: time, talent, and treasure. How you steward each of these resources significantly determines what kind of difference you will make, and what kind of legacy you will leave.

That’s what the parable of the three servants teaches us in the Gospel of Matthew. A master calls his three servants together, and then entrusts each of them to properly steward a sum of money. Then look at what happens:

“After a long time their master returned from his trip and called them to give an account of how they had used his money.” (Matthew 25:19, NLT)

This parable illustrates that God has entrusted each of us with resources, and one day our master, Jesus, will return to settle accounts. We won’t be judged for what somebody else was given, but we will be judged for how we used what God entrusted to us. Don’t let the unexpected keep you from giving back. Your time, talent, and treasure matter regardless of what pain has sidetracked you.

3. Connection: Who you’ve impacted

The third dimension of legacy is defined by the people you love and serve. Connection includes family, friends, mentees, co-workers, employees, neighbors, and even strangers. It’s about believing in others, treating them with respect, and investing in their lives. People live forever, which means the connection you make with them has eternal significance. One example of this is with our families. Psalm 78:4 says, “We will not hide these truths from our children; 
we will tell the next generation 
about the glorious deeds of the Lord, 
about his power and his mighty wonders” (NLT). Author and family ministry leader Reggie Joiner captures it well when he says:

“An inheritance is something you leave for your kids, and a legacy is something you leave in them.”

Recently during a conversation over coffee with my friend Jeff, we took some time to discuss the topic of legacy. Jeff shared with me how he recently attended a family gathering to celebrate his grandfather’s 90th birthday. During the gathering, various members of the family shared stories about the joy of growing up with Grandpa’s influence in their lives. As Jeff shared this experience with me, he made a powerful conclusion:

You don’t have to live a life of notoriety to live a life that matters.

Too often we equate legacy with fame or notoriety. The truth is, for most people, legacy will be filled with shades of anonymity. But that doesn’t diminish its impact. Jeff went on to describe to me the success and the health of so many people in his family, all of which could be traced back to his grandfather’s quiet, yet profound, influence.

[bctt tweet=”You don’t have to live a life of notoriety to live a life that matters.”]

Who are you impacting? Who are you investing time with? What relationships – inside and outside of your family – are you enriching by the words you speak, the life you model, and the growth you inspire? Don’t let unexpected pain rob you of investing in the people in your life who matter most.

4. Eternal Value: Why you do it

At the center of the Legacy Pyramid is a value for eternity. This value is the motivation behind the other three ingredients. It’s choosing to live, give, and relate in a way that matters to God and matters beyond the here and now.

Several years ago Sociologist Tony Campolo conducted a study in which fifty people over the age of 95 were asked one question: “If you could live your life over again, what would you do differently?” The question was open-ended, and while the responses varied, three themes emerged:

• If I had it to do over again, I would reflect more.
• If I had it to do over again, I would risk more.
• If I had it to do over again, I would do more things that would live on after I am dead.

Doing things, as Jesus said, “for the least of these” is eternal value. Sharing the hope of Christ with your friends and family is eternal value. Leveraging your God-given resources for God-glorifying purposes is eternal value. Laying up treasure in heaven by giving to things that matter to the heart of God is eternal value. Choosing to live a Christ-centered life is eternal value.

David understood this principle. Acts 13:36 “Now when David had served God’s purpose in his own generation, he fell asleep; he was buried with his ancestors and his body decayed” (NIV). Notice that David served God’s purpose, not his own purpose. Eternal value was the motivation behind his legacy.

When life unexpectedly disrupts your plans, choose the character, contribution, and connection to finish well. Make choices that one month, one year, and one lifetime from now will positively impact those around you. Nobody else has control over the legacy you will leave. Choose it wisely and then write it carefully.

This Article Was Adapted from My Book,

Unexpected: What to Do When Life Disrupts Your Plans.