Archives For Thinking

The Five Practices of Personal Growth

April 9, 2013 — 1 Comment

I can still remember reading John Maxwell’s early leadership book, Developing the Leader Within You, and thinking, “This is the best leadership book I’ve ever read.” Suddenly it occurred to me: “This is the only leadership book I’ve ever read.”

For years, personal growth wasn’t anywhere on my radar. I hated reading and throughout most of college, I only cracked half my textbooks (nothing like spending dad’s money to buy books you never read). Turns out, I wasn’t alone. Only 45% of Americans over the age of 13 read a book in the course of a year.

After graduating college with all the answers, it took me a couple of years to realize how little I actually knew. Eric Hoffer’s words described me well:

“In times of profound change, the learners inherit the earth, while the learned find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists.”

I was well-prepared for irrelevance. That newfound humility forced me into a learning mode. In the years that followed—mostly out of necessity—I developed a habit of reading. But more importantly, I stumbled upon five practices of personal growth that transformed my life. The first three practices maximize growth within us and the last two practices leverage growth in the people we influence.

Practice #1: Growth TRACing – Creating, implementing, and monitoring your personal growth happens through the process of Growth TRACing (pronounced tracking). A Growth TRAC is like a personal growth plan that provides the framework and direction for your growth. It includes four ingredients: Target, Roadmap, Accountability, and Check-Ups.

Your Target is your personal growth goal—a carefully crafted statement that articulates in which area of life you want to grow. Your Roadmap includes the training, resources, coaching, and experiences you’ll leverage to reach your target (in other words, “how” you plan to grow). Accountability gives you the support to stay the course. And Check-Ups are the periodic evaluations where you measure progress and make midcourse corrections. Growth TRACing gives direction to your learning and ultimately produces growth traction.

Practice #2: Reflective Thinking – Reflective thinking is the habit of processing what you learn as you implement your Growth TRAC. It helps you mine for the gold in what you’re learning and typically requires three things: time, questions, and takeaways.

Setting aside think time is often perceived as a waste of time, yet it’s essential if you want to assimilate your learning into daily practice. This process begins by asking questions that help you make sense of what you’re learning. Your questions should then lead you to specific takeaways for application. While your Growth TRAC sets the course for your learning, reflective thinking helps you make that learning personal, applicable, and meaningful. Reflective thinking ultimately results in mental maturity.

Practice #3: Tenacious Application – The knowing/doing gap is the toughest to close but can actually happen when you put this “action equation” to work: Inner Resolve x Outer Support = Tenacious Application.

Inner resolve combines conviction and courage so you have the determination to act on what you’ve learned. Outer support is a combination of accountability and dependence. It taps ongoing accountability from others while being fully dependent on God for His strength. When you multiply inner resolve by outer support, the result is the tenacious application of the things you’re learning. Tenacious application helps you move from learning and thinking to actually doing. It ultimately results in personal transformation.

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In Leadership, Personal Growth Application, Coaching, Empowering, Leadership, Mentoring, Personal Growth, Reflection, Thinking
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The Power of Positive and Resilient Thinking

January 14, 2013 — Leave a comment

How you think has the power to unlock your future. In fact, reaching your full potential begins first in your mind. You must Think to Your Full Potential before you see your potential fully realized. While there are numerous approaches to embrace in our thinking, I believe positive and resilient thinking are crucial. Consider two passages of Scripture:

Peter 3:1 – Dear friends, this is now my second letter to you. I have written both of them as reminders to stimulate you to wholesome thinking.  

Philippians 4:8 – Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

These two passages demonstrate the power of positive and resilient thinking. Being positive and resilient go hand in hand. Why? Because the need for positive thinking is most evident when we face setbacks in our lives. When we are positive, we’re able to be resilient…to bounce back from the setback.

In his book, The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth, John Maxwell illustrates the power of positive and resilient thinking in “The Law of Pain.” The Law of Pain says, “Good management of bad experiences leads to great growth.” Maxwell shares the story of Cheryl McGuinness to illustrate this law.

Cheryl lived through the horrific terrorist acts of 9/11…but her husband Tom did not. Tom was a pilot for American Airlines, and on September 11, 2001, Tom was the co-pilot of Flight #11, the first plane to crash into the World Trade Center.

Very quickly Cheryl discovered what it was like to be a single mom and a widow, but she coped the best that she could. As you reflect on her response, you quickly see that she chose a path of positive and resilient thinking. In her book, Beauty Beyond the Ashes, Cheryl says:

“I am learning more each day. The circumstances of 9/11 have forced me to examine who I am, to face myself in ways that I never had to before, to ask, ‘What does God want for me? What can I do in him, by his power within me? How will he use me to touch others?’ I am learning more about myself and about God. And I am learning it on my own, not through Tom’s filter.”

Because she chose a positive and resilient attitude, Cheryl has grown into a person she otherwise would not have become, despite the terrible acts of 9/11. On the 10th anniversary of 9/11 she said, “It’s a terrible, terrible day that I don’t think anybody can ever forget…Out of the ashes of September 11, out of the rubble that day, I can emerge to say that I am stronger today than 10 years ago.”

Cheryl’s good management of a bad experience has truly led to her growth. Positive and resilient thinking keeps our potential from dying with our pain. And if you’re going to reach your full potential, you must think positively and choose resilience even when your circumstances dictate otherwise.

Question: How has positive and resilient thinking changed your life and shaped your circumstances?

 

In Personal Growth Attitude, Positive, Potential, Resilience, Thinking
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Thinking…to Your Full Potential

January 12, 2013 — 1 Comment

Most people would eagerly admit that they want to reach their full potential. That process often starts at the beginning of a new year when we wipe the slate clean and start with a fresh set of goals. But if we’re not careful, we’ll carry our old way of thinking into our new ambitions for the future. Not until we change how we think can we unlock the door to our future.

I would suggest that your biggest problem is not your biggest problem. Lack of money, education, opportunity, influence, time, or ability are not your biggest problems. How you think, and how I think, is our biggest problem. How we think defines who we are. Poverty of the mind always precedes poverty of our circumstances.

One of the biggest things that sabotages our thinking is what I call “i3 Thinking.” i3 Thinking is inferiority, inadequacy, and insecurity. These three ugly monsters so easily imprison our lives.

  • Inferiority – Inferiority sells us a lie that everybody is better than us. We say to ourselves, “If I had more money, more connections, or more talent, then I would (fill in the blank).” Then we point at someone we consider superior to ourselves and say, “Pick her!” We benchmark ourselves against the people who we think are “the most qualified.” We look at people like Mother Teresa and say, “If I was like her, then I could make a difference too.” But how quickly we forget Mother Teresa’s words: “If you can’t feed a hundred people, then feed just one.” Inferiority focuses on everybody else’s superiority rather than on our personal responsibility.
  • Inadequacy – Inadequacy is the first cousin to inferiority. While inferiority makes the measure of success too high, inadequacy makes the assessment of one’s self too low. Inferiority says, “They’re too good for me.” Inadequacy says, “I’m too bad for them.” While inferiority focuses on everybody else’s superiority, inadequacy focuses on my insufficiency.
  • Insecurity – The third thinking barrier is driven by an attitude of fear. Insecurity focuses on the what-ifs and the what-might’s. We use excuses like “What if I fail?” or “What if I look foolish?” or “What if I let someone down?”

Even the Apostle Paul faced feelings of inferiority, inadequacy, and insecurity? Here’s a guy who wrote much of the New Testament, but when those feelings knocked on the door of his life, he simply chose not to open the door. For example, in 2 Corinthians we read about “false prophets” who were going around teaching and deceiving believers in the early church. What did Paul say?

For if someone comes to you and preaches a Jesus other than the Jesus we preached, or if you receive a different spirit from the one you received, or a different gospel from the one you accepted, you put up with it easily enough. But I do not think I am in the least inferior to those “super-apostles.” I may not be a trained speaker, but I do have knowledge. We have made this perfectly clear to you in every way. (2 Corinthians 11:4-6)

Inferiority tried to take hold of Paul’s thinking, but he refused to give it authority in his life. Consider also the modern-day story of Johnnetta McSwain. Johnetta struggled with inferiority, inadequacy, and insecurity more than most people. She was born to a single mom who didn’t want her, abused by her uncles, dropped out of school when she was in the 11th grade, and lived on the streets. She had two sons born out of wedlock and she would shoplift so she could dress in designer clothes.

But something changed on Johnnetta’s 30th birthday. She said, “That day I woke up and realized I had absolutely nothing to celebrate–no money, no full-time job, no home, no husband, and no clue, not even the will to do better…At last, I knew it was time to make some changes.”

And change she did. After two attempts she passed the test to get her GED. Driven by the thought that she had a chance to be anyone that she wanted to be, Johnnetta moved to Atlanta and enrolled in Kennesaw State University. She said, “I realized I didn’t have to be smart, I just had to be determined, motivated, and focused. This came with a high price tage for me. I had to exchange my thinking. I had to think like a smart person.” 

Johnnetta’s situation eventually changed. She graduated, then completed her Master’s, and now she’s working on her doctorate. But I want you to notice something critical to Johnnetta’s success. Before she could change her circumstances, she had to change her thinking. Inferiority, inadequacy, and insecurity had to be given an eviction notice. Step-by-step she had to choose to think differently.

If you are ever going to reach your full potential, it starts with your thinking. You have to throw away i3 Thinking (inferiority, inadequacy, and insecurity). Even though it feels like a giant magnet constantly pulling you to return to your old way of thinking, you have to make deliberate and disciplined choices everyday to step in a new direction. Zig Ziglar captured it best when he said:

“It’s impossible to consistently behave in a manner inconsistent with how we see ourselves. We can do very few things in a positive way if we feel negative about ourselves.”

Question: How are you overcoming inferiority, inadequacy, and insecurity in your life?

 

In Personal Growth Attitude, Inadequacy, Inferiority, Insecurity, Thinking
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Change Your Thinking with the “Thinking Seesaw”

September 12, 2012 — Leave a comment

The formation of beliefs and assumptions is a lot like a seesaw—you might have called it a teeter-totter as a kid. When you and your buddy sat on a teeter-totter, you would soar into the air as your feet launched you upward, and then, just as quickly, sink downward as your friend’s feet left the ground. While the up and down motion felt exhilarating, and perhaps even unsettling at times, your confidence was grounded in one thing—the base at the center of the seesaw. No matter how quickly you pushed up and how hard you came down, you knew the base wasn’t going anywhere. It was your anchor.

In personal growth, thinking is the mental teeter-totter at work. On one end of the seesaw are ideas, on the other end are practices, and in the middle—serving as the base—are absolutes.

 

Thinking Seesaw

Ideas are insights for living. They can fill your mind rapidly as you read great books, hear inspiring speeches, explore creative environments, or interact with wise mentors. As you activate a personal growth plan, there’s a good chance your mind will be saturated by fresh ideas in the areas of your life where you’ve chosen to grow. Some of these ideas will be proven, but others will be more like theories waiting to be tested as a practice.

Practices are strategies for achieving. If you’ve been around business for any length of time, you’ve probably heard the phrase, “best practices.” Best practices are those methods of doing business that are considered to deliver the best results. They are usually proven strategies for achieving the highest levels of success. There are also “best practices” in other areas of life too—spiritually, mentally, relationally and physically. And as you engage in lifelong learning, you’ll likely uncover some of these best practices in the areas where you’ve chosen to grow.

Ideas and practices freely move up and down on each side of the thinking seesaw. Your mental feet leave the ground as you learn new ideas and experiment with new practices. This flexibility keeps false assumptions and misinformed beliefs from becoming entrenched in your thinking. Eventually you’re able to settle on ideas and practices that actually work and leverage them to help you close your growth gaps.

I was working with a team of leaders a while back when we decided to evaluate the effectiveness of our small group ministry. We spent six weeks meeting together to take a hard look at our strengths and weaknesses, as well as ways to improve. This process allowed us to bring our ministry assumptions under the microscope. The mental teeter-totter was aggressively moving up and down as we examined fresh ideas and best practices.

At first it almost felt like chaos, unsure where things were going to land. The longer we sat on the thinking seesaw, the more exciting ideas we collected—several of which were untested—and the more we observed powerful best practices. But eventually we settled on a handful of ideas and practices—a refined model—that increased the health of our small groups. None of that would have been possible had we not been willing to challenge our assumptions and get comfortable with letting our feet leave the ground.

Are there areas of your life where you’ve abandoned the seesaw? Why not get on the teeter-totter once again as you put your growth plans to work. After all, what’s the point of crafting a growth plan if you’re not willing to challenge your long-held assumptions? Don’t be scared of the up and down motion—it’s necessary, even indispensable, if you want to gravitate toward the ideas and practices that will actually help you grow. This process is unsettling at times, which is why you need the security of your seesaw’s base—absolutes.

While ideas and practices are key components to challenging assumptions and forming beliefs, it’s important to remember that they are not absolutes. Absolutes are anchors of belief. Absolutes are the base of the seesaw. They are fixed—immovable. Absolutes are non-negotiable truth that does not change regardless of time, culture, or geography. In fact, absolute truth originates outside of yourself. Whether or not you believe absolutes does not change the fact that they’re still true. Absolutes don’t need your or my permission to be the truth—they stand as truth just fine regardless of our opinion. Absolutes are fully trustworthy and apply to everybody. They serve as the litmus test before embracing new beliefs, engaging new practices, or deeming a new idea as worthy of pursuit.

As human beings, we tend to drift toward the path of least resistance. If we’re not careful, we’ll adopt ideas and practices that are culturally acceptable, yet violate absolute truth. As you field-test ideas and practices, absolute truth keeps you grounded and helps you avoid the dangerous lure of deception. For this reason, I’ve adopted Original Truth—the Bible—as my source for absolute truth.

What is the base, the immovable absolutes, of your thinking seesaw? Without a rock-solid base, your ideas (those insights for living) and your practices (those strategies for achieving) will do more than keep you culturally relevant, they will ever so slowly mislead you.

When absolutes are firmly established as the base for your thinking, you can easily challenge your assumptions and beliefs. You can bring the ideas and practices—those things you’re gleaning in your learning journey—into the light where you can examine their validity. And you can climb onto the thinking seesaw—grounded in absolute truth—where you can continually explore fresh ideas and best practices.

Embracing absolutes does not mean you’ll live a sinless life. I believe Scripture is absolute truth, but I struggle every day to live that truth. I’m far from perfect. I sin. It’s a daily battle. But having a firm base to anchor my life and thinking to keeps me calibrated in the right direction. Without the base, my life would be nothing more than a soupy mess of misguided philosophies. Even the Apostle Paul said, “See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ” (Colossians 2:8).

At the Thinking Level of personal growth, beliefs are challenged and formed by learning new ideas and embracing best practices while allowing absolutes to serve as the final authority. Keep these three things in perspective.

Question: Are you leveraging the thinking seesaw to keep your mind fresh and your life relevant. What is the base of your thinking seesaw?

This post was adapted from my book, GO! Starting a Personal Growth Revolution. You can order a copy in my store here or on Amazon or Kindle. GO! is also available from Barnes & Noble. For bulk orders, email me here.

 

In Personal Growth Attitude, Growth, Ideas, Learning, Personal Growth, Practices, Thinking, Truth
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David Allen on Why You Need to Create Lists

August 26, 2011 — 2 Comments

Do you feel like your mind is overwhelmed with information and unable to process the onslaught of ideas and information coming at you? As the pace of life picks up speed, it’s increasingly harder to stay focused and keep your mind productive.

When Harvard Business Review asked productivity expert David Allen about the biggest roadblock to productivity that he observes when he enters an organization for the first time, he said, “People don’t capture stuff that has their attention. They don’t acknowledge it or objectify it. And it keeps rolling around in the organizational psyche as well as the personal psyche, draining energy and creating incredible psychic residue.”

This mental overload of information–representing hundreds of ideas and concepts–goes into a “black hole.” It isn’t captured, prioritized, or acted upon. Next steps are rarely identified and important insights are lost in a land of no return. Why is this? Because we don’t create lists. Allen says, “You need lists because your brain isn’t good at keeping them.” He further observes, “Your head is for having ideas, not holding them. Just dumping everything out of your head and externalizing it is a huge step, and it can have a significant effect.”

By creating lists, we make room for our minds to think about the right things. We free up thinking space for creativity, reflection, innovation, and clear decision-making. We capture important thoughts that need our attention…just not right now. And we develop a system to prioritize action steps and establish deadlines.

Question: Do you agree with David Allen’s observation about lists? What method do you use to keep lists and keep your thoughts organized?

In Personal Growth Ideas, Lists, Mind, Personal Growth, Productivity, Thinking
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Renewing Your Mind: Closing the Gap Between Conformed & Transformed

July 20, 2011 — 1 Comment

Thinking is a lot like Play-Doh…that was the focus of my last post. I concluded with the question: What is my mind most conformed to, what would a transformed mind look like, and how do I close the gap between the two?  I believe the Apostle Paul offers valuable insight in how to close that gap in Romans 12:2: Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Understanding Paul’s words provides a powerful framework for cultivating a renewed mind and ultimately experiencing a transformed life.

  • Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world - The word “conform,” refers to an outward expression of behavior that does not reflect what is inside of a person. The word actually implies the idea of masquerading. People wear masks when they’re trying to present an image of something they are not. So Paul is saying, when you conform yourself to the pattern of this world, you’re wearing a mask that is inconsistent with who you are as a follower of Christ. In other words, don’t masquerade as somebody who doesn’t know God. The word “world” is better translated “age.” That is, “Do not be conformed to this age.” “Age” is not so much focused on the people of the world, but rather the beliefs and philosophies of society. And while the world considers these beliefs and philosophies to be “wisdom,” Paul says, “Where is the wise man? Where is the scholar? Where is the philosopher of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world?” (1 Corinthians 1:20). The Message begins Romans 12:2 with these words: “Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking…” J.B. Phillips translated the passage, “Don’t let the world around you squeeze you into its own mold.” Here’s Paul’s Big Idea: “Don’t masquerade around, buying into the beliefs and philosophies of this age, or behaving in a way that’s inconsistent with who God redeemed you to be.”
In Personal Growth God's Will, Mind, Personal Growth, Thinking
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Play-Doh & Thinking

July 19, 2011 — 1 Comment

Walk down the aisles in your local toy store and eventually you’ll come across a favorite among kids that has stood the test of time: Play-Doh. Who could ever forget Play-Doh—bright yellow cans, a soft compound, and the unforgettable smell. Play-Doh has been around for years—since 1956 to be exact. Of course, when Play-Doh first hit the shelves in Washington D.C., it was only available in one brilliant color—off-white. Not like today where you can get Play-Doh in a wide assortment of colors like Rose Red, Purple Paradise, Blue Lagoon, or Garden Green. And for those hard-core Play-Doh fanatics, there’s even wood-scented Play-Doh for use with your Play-Doh Power Drill Kit or Buzzin’ Buzz Saw.

So just how big is the Play-Doh craze?

  • The formula for the original Play-Doh compound still remains top secret.
  • Today, Play-Doh is sold in more than 6,000 stores in the United States and in more than 75 countries worldwide.
  • If combined, the total amount of Play-Doh Compound manufactured since 1956 would weigh more than 700 million pounds. That’s equal to the weight of almost two Grand Coulee Dams in Washington or the weight of 159 fully-loaded Space Shuttles.
  • Approximately 95 million cans of Play-Doh Compound are manufactured each year, and more than 2 billion cans of Play-Doh have been sold since 1956.
  • If all the Play-Doh Compound made since 1956 was extruded through the Fun FactoryÒ, it would make a “snake” that would wrap around the world nearly 300 times. (ideafinder.com)

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In Personal Growth Attitude, Mind, Personal Growth, Thinking
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Reflective Thinking: The Forgotten Leadership Practice

November 11, 2009 — Leave a comment

One of the most healthy practices a leader can engage in is reflective thinking. Reflective thinking is the habit of processing what you learn in preparation for application. It is often the forgotten leadership practice. Reflective thinking is, for the most part, very unnatural, especially for leaders, high-achievers, or dominant personalities. These individuals are “doers” and rarely have a spare minute. Consequently, setting aside think time is perceived as a waste of time. Activity is seen as the key to accomplishment and while there is truth to that statement, there is also an inherent danger. Without reflective thinking you can easily do many things–wrong. Business author and leadership philosopher Peter Kostenbaum noted:

Reflection doesn’t take anything away from decisiveness, from being a person of action. In fact, it generates the inner toughness that you need to be an effective person of action–to be a leader. Think of leadership as the sum of two vectors: competence (your specialty, your skills, your know-how) and authenticity (your identity, your character, your attitude). When companies and people get stuck, they tend to apply more steam–more competence–to what got them into trouble in the first place: “If I try harder, I’ll be successful,” or “If we exert more control, we’ll get the results we need.”

Kostenbaum argues that you must change your “habits of thought.” Reflective thinking enables you to do just that and gives you the perspective to do a few things right–extraordinarily right. As unnatural as it might seem, I challenge you to embrace the forgotten leadership practice of reflective thinking. Set aside regular time to reflect on what you are learning, how God is challenging you through Scripture, your ministry or organizational practices, your personal disciplines, and your overall direction. Don’t get stuck “applying more steam” to worn out ways of thinking. Doing so will only thrust you into irrelevance at greater speeds. Stop. Reflect. Process. There’s usually plenty of time to act. Reflective thinking helps you do so with clarity, excellence, and precision.

 

In Leadership, Personal Growth Thinking
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i3 Thinking – Part 3

October 14, 2009 — Leave a comment

“i3 Thinking” is a common barrier people encounter when they sense the prompting to invest in the growth of others. In the last two posts, I’ve addressed the first two “i’s” – inferiority and inadequacy. The third “i” is “insecurity.”


Insecurity is driven by fear. It focuses on the what-ifs and what-might’s from a negative perspective. Insecurity produces anxiety and self-doubt and breeds fear about whether or not our investment would actually make a difference in someone’s life. “What if I fail?” “What if I look foolish?” Rather than focusing on the impact possibilities, we are distracted by the potential negative impact our efforts might have on us.

Mark Twain once said, “Keep away from people who are trying to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.” Twain’s words provide some good perspective when i3 Thinking tries to undermine your efforts to invest in people. First, they help us to remember that we have something great to offer. And second, they remind us to inspire greatness in others.

Questions: How is insecurity affecting your ability to invest in others? What steps can a person take to overcome “i3 Thinking.”
In Personal Growth Mentoring, Personal Growth, Thinking
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i3 Thinking – Part 2

October 14, 2009 — Leave a comment

“i3 Thinking” is a series of mental barriers that paralyze people from using their God given resources to invest in the people around them. The first “i” is “inferiority.” Today I want to examine the second “i” – “inadequacy.”


Inadequacy is a first cousin to inferiority. While inferiority makes the measure of success too high, inadequacy makes the assessment of one’s self too low. Inferiority says, “They’re too good for me.” Inadequacy says, “I’m too bad for them.” Rather than focusing on the few strengths that we can contribute to others’ growth, we lose perspective and stare at what feels like a mountain of weaknesses. We tell ourselves lies like, “I don’t have what it takes to coach someone,” “My resource pool is to shallow to allocate anything meaningful to somebody else’s growth,” or “My network of relationships could never add value to somebody else.” While inferiority focuses on everybody else’s superiority, inadequacy focuses on my insufficiency.

Questions: How does inadequacy show up in the life of a leader? How can a person overcome inadequacy in their thinking and make a meaningful investment in others?
In Personal Growth Mentoring, Personal Growth, Thinking
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